To love and be loved...

31st July is our Wedding Anniversary...Orang lain sambut anniversary with trips abroad, with diamond rings, with fancy dinner and rose bouquets...I am celebrating my anniversary alone, working on a weekend. Sadis or what??? My other half is still outstationed. He is on a barge somewhere in Malaysia/Thailand waters overseeing the installtion of a new oil rig. I just found out that I will only probably see him when I get back from Kuching. Limited chopper service and what not.

Selagi the conference in Kuching belum selesai selagi itu hatiku resah...I have no idea if my postgraduate students have stumbled onto this blog or not. Apologies for not reviewing your papers. Organising the conference in addition to my other juggling acts keeps me completely occupied during the day and by the time I get home dah nak termuntah dah tengok scripts. That's why I need to destress on here. It's the only way to keep me sane. I hope normal life will resume in two weeks time...

Salma Aida's 5th Birthday is coming up on 2nd August.
Angan2 nak buat a birthday bash to celebrate this milestone of hers is out the window now.
Kesian Aida kalau mummy and daddy both tak ada on her birthday. We'll try to make up for it after this Kuching trip...

Adam's fingers got scalded last Monday from boiling water and his fingers got a nasty burn. Everytime I come home at the end of the day tengok the dressing and bandage dah terburai, so I decided to take it off altogether tonight. Surprisingly he is doing a lot better without the bandage and is using his fingers again despite them looking in pretty bad shape still, what with the decaying skin and all. I hope it heels soon...

Walaubagaimanapun, setelah bermuhasabah diri seperti yang telah diingatkan oleh LadyLOVE, there is much to be thankful for...My better half and I have known each other for a long time and have supported each other through thick and thin such that small discomforts and sacrifices do not discourage us me. Well I can only speak for myself but I trust he feels the same way...OK, so we miss an anniversary, we miss a birthday, its no big deal. Because on the grand scheme of things we are sincerely thankful to be in Allah's blessings...

Rather than say how much I love my husband or how good a father he is, I am inclined to leave a poem I love to commemorate this special occasion. This classic poem probably best represents me as I am today, and how I feel about being a wife and subsequently mother for the past 6 years...

It's All I Have to Bring To-day

by Emily Dickinson (1830 - 1886)

It's all I have to bring to-day,

This, and my heart beside,

This, and my heart, and all the fields,

And all the meadows wide.

Be sure you count, should I forget, --

Someone the sum could tell, --

This, and my heart, and all the bees

Which in the clover dwell.

Interpretation of this poem can be found here. A couple of my favourite ones are excerpted below...

1. It seems that the author begins rather apologetically and abjectly:

"It's all I have to bring today - "This" is the poem she is writing. Immediately, however, she realises that she IS bringing more - her heart as well. And then all the fields, meadows and bees. She is giving the gift of counting our blessings.

2. Dickinson was trying to express her belief that all she had to offer is what she holds in her heart, but at the same time I also got the impression that she believed that was far more than enough. She says that although she only has her heart to bring she also has the fields and meadows wide, inspiring the idea that her heart is a lot more than it may at first seem. This, I think, is supported by her saying that she could lose count of the value of her own heart.


Who knows what the future holds for us tetapi doaku mudah2an kebahagiaan rumahtanggaku akan terus berkekalan, kami dipanjangkan dan diberkati umur, ditetapkan iman, dimurahkan rezeki, ditambahkan zuriat, amin. For now, it is enough to love and be loved...